Thursday, October 03, 2013

You Can't Go Home Again (But With Memories You Don't Need To)

My grandmother sent an e-mail out today, the subject line of which was an address:  54 Fairfield Street.  That was my address in Carlisle, PA where I grew up, where we lived until October 1990 when we moved to another part of Carlisle.  Curious as to what it was about, I read further & found that the house is, once again, up for sale.  More intriguing, pictures of the house are included on the realtor's website.  She encouraged us to take a look, noting that my uncle had looked & had seen nothing about the house that even remotely looked like when we had lived there.

With more curiousity than dread, I decided to check out the site after I finished paying some bills.  I typed the address into the search on the realtor's website & immediately the house came up.  Immediately I recognized the house & knew everything was loading properly, having been by the house dozens of times since we moved out & I knew what changes had been made to the exterior.  When we lived there, the house was white aluminum siding, but since had been replaced with a greyish vinyl siding.  They had also covered the nearby garage with it, enclosing the breezeway where we used to sit in the summertime.  No matter what time of day, it always seemed there was an actual breeze & actually felt cool.  Now, I'm sure, it's a bit more temperature controlled for year-round usage.  I moved on to the remainder of the pictures, recognizing some of the rooms, but with a different look.  Even though my grandfather spent countless hours painting before we moved out, fresh coats covered each wall in different colors than I remember.  The kitchen had modern appliances & different trim.  The rooms that had wooden floors looked to shine with a newness, far from the worn wooden floors we walked on.  The most recent owners had even built in a wall to separate the living room & the back room, something that just really stood out to me, but looked really good.  Shots of the backyard showed plenty of green grass & trees, but still seemed like an updated, newer version of what we had.  I let the slideshow play through until the end & just thought for a few minutes aftewards about everything.  It's when I realized that it wasn't about what they pictures showed, it's about what they DIDN'T show.

Just like my aforementioned memories of the breezeway, it seemed a lot I remembered about the old house had been covered up by new, modern advances, but if I looked close enough, I could see them in my mind's eye.  The front door was hardly ever used as that, only when unknowing mailman substitutes came to drop off bills or in the summertime when we'd leave the door open to let air in (as well as the busy sounds of Rte 81).  I saw nothing of the narrow hallway that led to my grandparents' bedroom, the bathroom, the door to the 2nd floor, & a small closet where an index card hung on the inside of the door with my birth date, time, height & weight (for what reason, I don't know).  One of the upstairs bedrooms, the one where my uncle stayed, looked different without an Air Force poster on the door.  I didn't even recognize the basement at first because it seemed to have more light in it, possibly because it wasn't full, as our basement had always been.  There were no Sir Walter Raleigh tobacco cans filled with nuts & bolts sitting on shelves or on the window sills.  I wondered if you still had to duck to walk down the steps to get into the basement because of the big wooden beam or if they had someone corrected that also.  The garage was much the same as the basement:  a lot of light & seemed far too empty.  Absolutely no cardboard boxes sat on the floor, filled with old, brittle records that we used to play as Pap & I tinkered around at his work bench.  No engine for an old Ford truck on a hoist, waiting to be dismantled & scrapped because it needed to go & we needed something to do.  The above-ground pool that we used every summer, listening to the Drifters or the Dirty Dancing soundtrack as we splashed around, was no longer there, apparently for more yard space.  I didn't even want to see what happened to the old shed in the backyard,  It was rickety when we used it, but we still used it.  The upper loft was a bit dangerous to explore, but I always liked walking around on the ground floor.  Every now & then I'd run across an old football card laying partially covered in dirt & chewed by mice at the corners.  If that had been a 13-14 year old me, I'd have been dismayed at finding them.  But to a 5 year old, it was like finding treasure, no matter what condition they were in.  I doubt the most recent owners were gardeners, but they had some great land for it behind the shed.  My Pap loved to raise all sorts of vegetables there & we ate pretty well because of it.  I'd sometimes watch him work there while I swung on the nearby tire swing.

So while all of these thoughts came back to me & I felt slightly annoyed that things had changed, I sighed & remembered that time marches on.  I couldn't expect the people who bought the house from us to leave things unchanged, just as those owners can't think whoever buys it next will not want to improve it.  But no matter how much paint or building materials they'd use or how much cleaning they'd do, they can't cover up the memories I had built in 10 years there.  I can see things there just as clearly now as I did actually living in it back then.  Time will probably make those memories fuzzier as I get older, but they'll still be in there, stored somewhere in the folds of grey matter.  As cool as it would be to own that place, knowing it's where I grew up, it's not necessary as long as I still own those memories & can revisit them from time to time.

Hope you guys (and gals) didn't mind my stroll down memory lane.  Do any of you have strong memories of the first house you lived in?  Feel free to share any of them in the comments below.  I look forward to reading them.

Wednesday, August 21, 2013

Keeping You In the Loop

Anytime I friend someone on Facebook or follow them on Twitter it's usually because we share some sort of connection, like we've known each other somewhere along the way & I want to stay in touch.  Because of this, I like to keep you updated if there's something going on that I would want to tell a friend or family member.  I appreciate each & every one of you.

That being said, it's time for a health update.  As most of you know, I've been dealing with something unknown for over a year.  It hasn't given me any symptoms, other than I've had some swelled lymph nodes.  In order to figure out once & for all what's going on, I had one removed from the left side of my neck & biopsied.  Last week, the information was handed down from the surgeon & confirmed this week by the oncologist I've been seeing for this year plus process:  I have Nodular Lymphocyte Predominant Hodgkin's Lymphoma.

NOW, before any of you freak out & go crazy...yes, it is cancer BUT I'm assured by my oncologist that no matter what stage I'm in with this particular strain, it is curable.  Everything that I've been seeing is in the 90's percentage-wise for success rate.  This is a huge load off of my mind just knowing what we're dealing with & that it can be treated/cured.  Right now the toughest parts that I'm dealing with are all of the appointments leading up to the treatment.  I just had my bone marrow biopsy today (NOT FUN...this should be a Guantanamo torture tactic), then a PET scan tomorrow.  Next week is a pulmonary test & an EKG just to make sure I'll be able to handle treatments.  Once all of this info is in & I get a second opinion from either Johns Hopkins or Hershey Medical Center, then we can start treatment.  I'll be on chemo for probably about 6 months (once every two weeks for 12 treatments).  I may lose some of my hair & I may be tired some days, but it's what I have to do.  I'm a worrier, as most of you know, but with this, I'm not worried.  I realize that I worry about things I can control (money, jobs, elections...wait, I can't control those...), but this is something that I can't.  This is out of my hands.  I believe in God & I firmly believe that He is in control of this situation.  Just knowing that lifts the burden off of my shoulders & allows me to function where others may be flipping their lids.

The sentence that most comes out of peoples' mouths when I've been telling them what's going on is "If you need anything, don't hesitate to ask."  Honestly, this is one of the toughest questions to answer, yet it's also easy.  I'm a person who doesn't like to rely on others for anything.  I'd rather be the one to help if there's any needed.  So really I can't think of anything anyone can do at this time except to give me all of the prayers & positive thoughts you feel it in your heart to give.  I know the doctors are very positive, but if there's one thing I've learned over time, it's that there is no such thing as too much prayer...unless you're an atheist, then substitute "prayer" with "positive thoughts".  Both of those are extremely welcome & I'm very touched at those who have reached out & already given these for me.  On the days in the future when I will sometimes look at humanity with a stink-eye, I'll remember that there still are good people out there who come through in times of need.

So, with all of this being said, do I have any questions?  I'm happy to answer anything that you have & if I don't know, I will certainly find out for you.  From time to time I plan on making my blogs about what's going on with me through this process, but I won't make it all about the process.  To do that would be to give too much spotlight to it & frankly, I can't handle being serious all that often.  One thing I won't allow this to take away from me is my sense of humor, so don't expect that to go away any time soon :)  So keep checking here or check in with me on my other various forms of social media.  If you've made it this far in this blog, I'm hoping you will.  Thanks for reading & thanks for caring.  Love to all!

Wednesday, August 07, 2013

Woohoo! for New "Who"

This weekend, unless you're not involved in social media at all (in which case, how are you seeing this?) or don't watch much TV, it was announced that veteran Scottish actor Peter Capaldi will be taking over the role of the Doctor in the long-running British sci-fi TV show "Doctor Who".  I join the numerous positive comments on this choice and congratulate Mr. Capaldi on landing the job.  To be honest, I've only ever seen him in two other roles before this was announced.  Funny enough, one of those was as the patriarch of a Pompeiian family in a previous season's episode of "Doctor Who" (before you consider that strange, check out Colin Baker, who played a Gallifreyan guard during the 5th Doctor's tenure, then went on to be the 6th Doctor).  The other was in the "Doctor Who" spinoff, "Torchwood", during their "Children of Earth" series of episodes.  His role was a very tortured, dark role, but well played.  I look forward to exploring his other works that have been mentioned online since then (especially one called "Local Hero", which looks great).

Besides being a choice of a great actor, I applaud this decision on another level.  When the original run of this show was televised starting in 1963 until the late 80's, it was all about the sci-fi entertainment.  While there were other plots and elements woven in, the main points were most assuredly about the time and space traveling, the scary monsters, the strange worlds, etc...  But with the kickoff of the new seasons in the 2000's, "Doctor Who" has inserted relevant issues of our day into the stories.  Not only are they entertaining, but they make us think.  The show does just about the best balance of this of any other show I've seen.  Of course at the center of it all has always been the Doctor, the mad "spaceman" in a blue box called the TARDIS, that travels in time and space.  Most assuredly he's the star of the show, but when someone else needs the spotlight, the Doctor just blends in for the sake of the story.  When it was announced earlier this year that 11th Doctor Matt Smith would be leaving, a whirlwind of controversy was stirred up.  Because the Doctor has the ability to regenerate and change his appearance instead of dying outright, many have left this open to interpretation about who could take over the prestigious acting role.  Questions about possibly having a woman become the 12th Doctor arose.  Quickly names like Emma Watson & Helen Mirren were thrown about for consideration.  There was also a suggestion about someone of a different race taking over (all previous incarnations of the Doctor have been white males).  I didn't disagree with anyone that was named as a possible replacement, including any of the women or guys of a different race, but in the end I think Peter Capaldi was just about the best choice of any...and here's why.

Like I said previously, the newer seasons of "Doctor Who" work so well because it has the ability to make points relevant to today's day and age (somewhat in the same way "Star Trek" did), with keeping a main character that could fade in and out for the sake of the story as needed.  Now imagine pressure from various groups to suddenly change the Doctor into, for example, a black male or a female, just because it's possible and "because they can".  Suddenly, with one of those changes, the Doctor becomes the focal point of every show.  It becomes a change for the sake of change, not for relevancy of the story.  Let's be honest:  those who will actually stop watching "Doctor Who" because they picked another "white guy" probably weren't fans in the first place.  Most, if not all, Whovians would want what's best for the show, what is most logical.  What makes most sense is to put someone in the Doctor's shoes who blends in to the part as if he had always been there.  To do anything else would interrupt what the new series has worked to build just to placate special interest groups that were only concerned about the publicity from a controversy.  Ultimately, I think head writer Steven Moffat did what he felt was best.  Ever since Russell T. Davies left has head writer at the end of the 10th Doctor David Tennant's tenure, Moffat has made decisions that have Whovians talking, blogging, tweeting, etc... and not always in a good way.  It was his idea, though, to consider Capaldi for the role of the Doctor.  In fact, according to the live announcement special, he had almost put him in as the 11th Doctor in place of Matt Smith, but decided against it, thinking the time was not exactly right.  It's that type of person that I like to see in charge of such a decision.  Moffat will not make a knee-jerk reaction just to ride the wind of political correctness or cave in to pressure of a select few.  Again, to draw another "Star Trek" parallel, "The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few or the one".  The "many", in this case, are we Whovians who care deeply about this show.

Unfortunately, we will have to wait for a new "Who" episode until November, which will be the 50th anniversary episode & Matt Smith's penultimate.  The no-doubt emotional on-screen regeneration of Matt Smith's 11th Doctor into Peter Capaldi's 12th Doctor will come at Christmas, a time fans of the new series have come to look forward to because of the great special episodes released that day most every year since the Doctor reappeared on our televisions.  If this Christmas is anything like last year's, I will hopefully receive more cool "Who" merchandise, too! (Hint, hint!)  But first, I'll be patiently waiting for November to get here for the 50th.  Yeah...patiently waiting...  Does anyone have a spare TARDIS they're not using?  There's someWHEN I have to be  :)

(I hope you've enjoyed this blog, even if you're not a Whovian like me.  Any questions, comments, criticism or suggestions?  Post them here, hit me up on Facebook, or send me a tweet @nBoEnforcer)

Saturday, August 03, 2013

Know Your Elvis Lyrics

Wow, it's been a long time since I've written anything here.  Yeah, I know...I write that every time it's been a while, but it's actually been over a year.  Just to keep you updated from what I wrote last time, currently I'm in a holding pattern (is that pilot lingo?) about whatever mystery illness is going on inside my body.  I still feel awesome, but these lymph nodes keep growing.  A few days ago, a surgeon removed the node from the left side of my neck & I'm waiting for the results of the biopsy.  When I get some news, I'll be sure to pass it along.  I'd like to say I'll blog about it here, but my track record hasn't been great with being timely.  Hopefully that will change & I can keep everyone updated.

Since I felt a LOT better today (some neck stiffness, but no pain), we decided to go to the Shade Gap Festival tonight.  This has become a ritual since Holly & I were married (at least I think it's been that long that we've been coming) & I only think we've missed 1 or 2 years.  Friday night of the festival is usually a pretty packed night, but still fun.  Of course, there's the typical fair food, which is the highlight of any day that you can sample it.  I haven't had much of an appetite for most of the week, so tonight was a good night for it to return.  My menu tonight consisted of a bowl of chicken pot pie (the "slippery" kind, to distinguish), a piece of pecan pie, finishing up Holly's cheese fries, mozzarella sticks with marinara (I think they got smaller this year), a scoop of butter pecan ice cream, & most of Bristol's vanilla ice cream.  Healthy, right?  Luckily, I don't care.  If it tastes good, I'm all for it.  Along with the food, there's the entertainment.  Every year we've gone on the Friday of the festival, a band called the Fabulous Flashbacks plays.  Last year they had almost a complete revamping of the entire band (at least, it's the way it seems), so it seemed they were slightly off.  This year, the music sounded great, but the vocals needed some work.  In case this gets back to any of them, it was still enjoyable, but there was room for improvement.  Particularly, I'm talking about the lyrics.  For a band that does cover songs (none original, at least at this gig) that everyone has heard for years, you'd think the lyrics would come a little bit easier, ESPECIALLY when it comes to Elvis.  He's the King of Rock & Roll, one of the most influential entertainers of the 20th century, & will probably be required study for music courses in 50 years, yet the lead singer was stumbling over "Burning Love".  Maybe it was an off-night?  I'd chalk it up to that, except that it was the same way last year.  I'm not saying I'm perfect at lyrics, but I tend to be more anal about them than most people...ok, I'm even more picky about them than an American Idol judge during top 12.  IT'S ELVIS, PEOPLE.  I can understand not knowing all the lyrics to one of his unreleased songs, but "Burning Love" is one of the King's most popular.  If you're an oldies band, this should be second nature to you.  I know what some of you are thinking:  "If you think YOU'RE so great, why don't YOU do it?"  I'm willing to do it.  If anyone needs a lead singer for an oldies band, one that doesn't play an instrument, I'm all for it.  Once I get over the initial stage fright, I think I'd be good to go.  But that's for another discussion another day.  BTW, the band played 3 sets of about an hour each, so I do give them props for that.  Most bands would only do two 45 minute sets & be done.  That being said, I'm looking forward to next year.

I spent a bit of time revamping the layout of this blog with some of Blogger's new templates & options, then I wrote this out.  Doing all that while watching Big Brother After Dark makes 1 1/2 hours go by fast.  Usually watching live feeds isn't that entertaining, but there were actually some funny parts tonight.  Plus they showed Aaryn on TV a lot tonight.  Yeah, I know she said racist comments, but she's still the hottest woman in the house.  Watching with the sound off is acceptable, if she starts talking stupid.

Now it's time for bed.  I don't have really anything planned tomorrow, except for watching whatever race is televised tomorrow.  Maybe I'll blog about that...or it could be something else completely random.  Who knows?  Whatever it may be, feel free to comment as you so choose.  That might help me decide if I should keep up with this!